Sinuses and Lukas

It is a very good man who goes out early on a Sunday morning to bring home distilled water and special sinus rinse medicine, warms that water in a bottle, carefully mixes in the medicine, shoots it up my nose, holds me in his lap and rocks me around gently to move it around inside me, then rubs my back while I clean out my sinuses. He's a good daddy. 

I'm sick :( I think it's because I've been pretty much trapped in our apartment building for so long and going out Friday exposed me to germs I wasn't prepared for. We stayed home mostly yesterday except for going to the grocery store. 

I'm trying to blog less and write more with Lukas. I am nearly finished with chapter 10 and I hope to finish it today. Ash plans to relax with video games today. Me being sick means I'm not pawing at him to take me out and do stuff. :) He enjoys a good day at home resting and he deserves it. Ok back to writing... 

Best in Show...

We are home on a Friday night. We argued and then spent a LONG time in bed making up so we missed our movie time.

We went to lunch with some of his friends and his one friend who normally never addresses me made some rude comments. 

He started off nice, asked me how my classes were going... but when I told him they'd just started and I'd been out of school since the spring semester, he said, "What have you been doing since May? What have you been doing?" 

"Keeping up with the house, going to the gym... um," that was all I could think of. 

"Wow, that must be nice! I wish I could do that." 

Then A. jumped in saying "Emi runs my life. He takes care of me and he's very good with the home budget. I save so much having him. He does everything for me." That was the only time he jumped in. Then he kind of ignored it and talked to his other friends. 

This rude friend kept coming back to me even though I was trying to ignore him and not make eye contact and play on my phone. He kept asking me what it's like to not do anything. He was trying to be funny about it and I don't even think he realized how rude it was. 

At one point he told me that in his country, there was a word in Arabic for boys like me that translates to like a poodle or show dog. He said it's boys who lay around all day looking pretty and waiting to be pet, fed, or played with. 

I looked at A. who was turned away from us and talking in Farsi to his other friend. I looked back at the rude guy, then I got up and left. I went to the bathroom and texted A. to let me know when he was walking out to the valet and I'd meet him there. 

He didn't know I was in the bathroom so he called me to ask where I was and what was wrong. I told him I didn't want to ruin his lunch, but I was done and I'd meet up with him when he finished. He paid for our ticket and got my food to go then I met him at the valet. I wasn't even hungry anymore so I didn't take the food from him. 

I told him what happened on the way home, and he kept trying to explain it away like the friend says shocking things to be funny and that he was teasing me because he had an obvious crush on me. 

That was so not the case. I hate when guys think that someone being rude and obnoxious is a way to flirt. No. No one enjoys being called a show dog or whatever the Arabic word meant. 

A. said Omani guys are like that and he will make sure I'm not alone with him like that ever again. 

He said the guy expected me to tease him back. I reminded A. that he frowns whenever I get into conversations with his friends outside of when he is participating. I told him that he wants me to be his quiet sidekick boy, but if he wants that then he should defend me when his friends are being rude. 

We went back and forth until we got home. We never yell at each other, that's not how we are. It's more like a polite back and forth with the goal of making each other happy. 

He said most of his friends respect me as his boy and perhaps that friend doesn't respect him that he would even engage me like that whether flirtatious or rude. I think he understood that it wasn't just someone being playful and it hurt my feelings. I'm pretty insecure about not working or contributing financially to things and when someone works hard to press on that nerve, it makes me feel pretty bad. 

I didn't cry though. A. agreed that he should have paid more attention. He said he wouldn't have wanted me to be rude back to the guy. He called the guy and yelled at him in Farsi or Arabic. He speaks both. He told me the guy will not bother me again. 

How old does he treat you?

How old are you in your Arab or Persian's eyes? 

I was thinking that today after emailing with a friend about the restrictions put on him by his Arab guy. My guy is Persian, but a quarter Arab on his mom's side so it's easier to lump him into that even though I'd never say that to his face. He's very much a proud Persian.... ANYWAYS!

I love this look. I get this look when I pin him down on the bed and he looks up at me like, "Really? You think you're tough? What you gonna do?" 

I was thinking of this sliding scale of indicators to tell just how old you are in your Arab's eyes. 

When we started dating, I was about a five year old in his eyes. He would leave me alone either in my father's home, or at pre-planned activities like specific classes or things with my friends. He would take me and pick me up. 

Right now I kind of place myself at a 7 or 8 year old. I'm allowed to roam our building, but I can't go across the street or out on my own. He doesn't think it's safe. We have the tracker apps on our phones so we can always see where each other is. That's something most couples probably do though. 

Once we have kids, I'll be like a teenager, hopefully. I will learn to drive and be able to go places and take the kids around. But maybe not. Maybe when he becomes a father, it'll make him even more protective. 

I get this look when he explains to me I can't walk a block away by myself to the drugstore. It's the look that says, "The world is too dangerous for you. Be ok with my rules, please." 

I should make a chart! You find the indicators that best fit your relationship and it gives a real age equivalent. That could be an app! 

Some days I slide all the way down to baby, especially if we are on vacation and he has time to focus too much on me. Or when we are around his friends I slide down to toddler. 

I'm not complaining. I know I could be with a guy who is more into an equal type relationship, but I like what I have. I find my freedoms in little ways here and there, but at the end of the day I love the arms that hold me and tell me it's bedtime and rub me until I fall asleep on his chest. 

Earthquake!!! Awkward Survival Tips.

Lukas chapter 9 is up. I'm happy the feedback so far is good on it. I was worried. I'm already going on the next chapter. I have a plan and I think it'll shake things up a little. Just trying to figure out the line between hot-dirty and gross-dirty. It's not so much about the line as it is the writing. You can do obscenely filthy things with characters, but if it's done right then it works.

I met my tutor yesterday. He helped me go through the first few things in each course and he set up a plan with activities in my Google student calendar so every morning I get a list of things to check off like readings, forum post, etcetera… that's a great word. It's Latin. Two words, et meaning “and;” cetera meaning “similar things.”

He's a cool guy, 80% business and 20% fun. A (Persian husband) gave us a speech about him not doing the work for me, just making sure I have enough help to learn what I need. I think it'll work out. I'm seeing him again tomorrow then it's labor day weekend. Yay.

Did anyone feel the 4.4 earthquake? It was like two short ones at 7:30. I was just coming back from doing the dishes and A was pacing in the living room talking on the phone. His first instinct was to grab me and my first was to duck behind the back of the couch.

It's funny how your instincts take over like that. I was trained to get next to something bigger than me and taller so if crap falls from the ceiling it has something to break it's fall instead of crushing me. It's called the triangle of safety or something. His instinct was to pull me into his chest to protect me.

So it was like he reached for me with his arms and I dropped down. Lol. It was awkward. He got down with me for the second one. He says we felt it stronger than it was because this is a new construction building with earthquake safety so the building is designed to roll and rumble with the Earth rather than stand strong and crumble. We had very different earthquake training. In Iran they got in door frames and under desks. In California, we used to get under desks, then learned the triangle of safety.

Dinner & a Movie with a Memory

We went with his friends last night to dinner and to see Crazy Rich Asians. If you haven't seen it, you must! There is so much to love about this movie and you don't have to know anything about Chinese culture or Singapore to love it. You will see all these actors from a variety of tv shows and be like "Oh that's that guy from that show!" or "I love her!" 

So many hot guys in this film!!

So much of the movie made me think back to my Emerson and Ali story, and even more to Lincoln and Amir. I looked back and realized that I first started Emerson and the Lion (my first story to be posted online) August 30th, 2015. 

That's almost three years ago! OMG I can't even remember what my life was like back when I started writing that. 

I had only known A for a little over two months and I was still living in my father's home. It was my first week being a real college student and not a high school kid taking college classes. I remember how weird it felt to not wake up at 5:30 to head to my first day of school. I remember A (now my husband) refusing to let me take the bus. He got up early to be able to pick me up. I even offered to ride my bike over to his place and then go from there, but he came over and I made him breakfast. 

Ok I'll blog about that stuff later. A three year anniversary for Emerson and the beginning of putting stories up. It seems like a lifetime ago. 

But some of the stuff in the movie like the plane with the private room pod! I put that in the Lincoln series! I know I didn't invent it, but it just was so cool to see it on the screen and imagine my characters in there having sex and watching movies to pass the long flight to Satra. Then there was the home and parties and servants and everything else I imagined Emerson walking in to. It's a really great film! Please go see it! 😍

We went to a really fancy Chinese restaurant before the movie. Being out here closer to the San Gabriel Valley we have the most Chinese-dominant cities in the US and it's probably only second to the Bay Area in overall populations. 

Dumplings are Bomb! 

I had an assortment of dumplings. One had soup in it! So when I bit into it there was this really good soup. Another one had vegetables. The string beans with almonds were my favorite, and the spicy noodles were too hot for me. 🤤

I was sitting between A and one of his friends that I don't know very well. Halfway into dinner, A got up and made me switch seats with him. He said he was having trouble hearing his friend across the table, but then later he told me the guy I was sitting next to was too interested. I thought he was just making nice conversation, but then he kept taking pictures of the food and everyone and A said he was trying to just get pictures of me. Sometimes I zone out with his friends because they use Farsi and Arabic and languages/inside jokes that I don't understand. I don't always pick up when someone seems genuinely friendly and interested in my life versus someone who is trying to move in on me. 🤷

We woke up this morning to find out there was an earthquake in Iran. A's family is all safe. It was a big one. 

Go see this movie!! You will not be disappointed!

Almost finished! I'm finally pretty.

I'm so excited. For the last year-point-five, I've been doing the invisalign trays and I'm almost finished. My teeth are so pretty now. They weren't super jacked up, but like the dentist guy said the bite was wrong and it would cause problems later in life. My dentist growing up said the same thing, but my dad couldn't afford braces. 

A. (persian husband) started taking me to his dentist when he first moved me into the house he got for us. He told my dad he would be responsible for my medical needs. When his Persian dentist (everything in his world must be Persian) said I needed them, he immediately said yes. They are crazy expensive and I go through two trays a month. I told him he didn't have to get me any other gifts or clothes for the whole year, but he just laughed and rolled his eyes at me. He doesn't like me talking about money and says it is his duty to take care of those things. 

The only time they hurt is when you first put in a new tray. It feels ok for an hour then it hurts for a few hours then fades to a dull ache then is fine. I usually take an Advil PM when we get home from the dentist so I can make him dinner then pass out on the couch while he works then he takes me to bed when he's ready. Today I just took a regular advil since we went to the dentist so early. 

The only times they get in the way is when I'm talking and I sound all lispy with them in, OR when we are at a restaurant and I have to duck under the table to take them out. Usually I go to the restroom so I can rinse off the spit and put them in their case. I'm feeling more confident with smiling and even kissing. I always worried his tongue would judge my teeth. 

If you ever consider them, the best way to clean is getting that clear natural mouthwash and soaking them in that while you are eating. My teeth are looking really nice now! A. says I look like a kept boy from West Hollywood.  I guess that's a good thing. 

After the dentist we went to get haircuts at the Persian barber. We got a new one when we moved. This is a nice older guy who speaks with A in Farsi the whole time. A tells him exactly how he likes my hair (a super tight 1 on the sides and just trim a little on top). He doesn't tell him that he likes it long on top so he can grip it when we're doing stuff. 

He likes a good sprout on top to grab and play with. It works best when I crawl on the floor all stealthy to just between his legs when he's working on the couch. I nuzzle in between his legs and bump the laptop until he moves it to the side then pulls my hair to guide me in... ok this got dirty, sorry... 

I promise I am going to finish Lukas this weekend! We have plans Saturday but other than that I should have some time. I already started on my new classes! I'm excited.  

Pirates and Tutors

We are having a pretty normal week. :) It's nice and boring, but with stuff to do. 

I got the information for my classes. I have four of them and I can look at the projects and the lectures. I only had to buy one big book, the rest had readings in pdfs which is kind of cool. 

Lukas is coming along. I just need a sex scene, but I keep getting distracted while working on it. I'm more excited for the next chapter. The tenth! I need some big drama to shake things up. I need to kick this series back into high gear. I need big drama, big sex, lights, action, fury, fire, 2 cans of whoop-ass, and a scented candle. Maybe Lukas will be kidnapped by a pirate.... 

So A. (the Persian husband) hired a tutor for me. We meet next week! I'm excited. We texted which is really weird because the only two people use my phone number, A and my dad. My friends use whatsapp or hangouts to text me. I like whatsapp because I get in on the group messages so even if I'm not really part of their daily world I get to see the back and forth arguments, memes, and jokes and feel included. 

Anyways, so the tutor was texting me and of course A is included in it. We are going to start next week and meet at A's office when he is there working. He's going to help me plan out the projects  and assignments so I get everything done. A says I am NOT to use him to do my classes for me. I would never do that!! I don't know why he would feel the need to explicitly tell me that. 

A said he was a skinny kid who is focused, but will be fun for me to work with. He knows I mostly just need a slightly encouraging friend to work with. I'm a great students. I always get my A, except in math... and science. But in my major stuff like English or Writing, I always get my A. I do way more than is required. 

It's interesting because he says the guy is Asian, but with A that could mean anything. He could be Russian, Indian, Arab, Chinese, Eastern Egyptian, or Turkish. I didn't want to ask him more about it because I feel weird talking about stuff like that with him. I think in the US, we mostly assume that when someone is called Asian, they mean East Asian, but it's a huge continent with tons of different cultures. He likes to confuse me with that stuff to "open my mind." 

birthday weekend

He had a great birthday weekend!! I think. He seems happy.

Saturday we went to the outlets then went to this Japanese place where you sit around the grill and the guy makes food right in front of you! I've seen it in TV but when I mentioned to him that I've never been to one he demanded we go. It was so cool. You get to order two or three kinds of meat so we each ordered two knowing I would only eat one. So chicken for me and steak, chicken, and more steak for him. I did have a bite of the steak. It was pretty good but the grilled vegetables were amazing!

We shared a grill with these straight girls having a girls night and they loved us. A. (husband) was charming them like he does with strangers. He was complaining to them that I never take him out or let him eat steak (so many lies!!!). They adored him. When he saw they were turning against me though, he told them what a wonderful husband I am and how much I put up with. We both got adored after that. I am the worst with chopsticks. He, of course, uses them flawlessly.

For his birthday party I decorated the tree for him (we have this Norfolk pine that is about 4 feet tall in it's pot. We got it two years ago. When we get a house we will plant it, but it's great to decorate for Christmas and birthdays/anniversaries. It's not too messy for an indoor plant.). I put all the ornaments we bought from places we visited and pictures of us along with a string of clear lights.

His friends and my friends came over and there was alcohol. We grilled up on the rooftop patio thing and he kept making me go put more sunblock on. It was hot up there :(. He needed a relaxing day without work and entering his 30s is a big deal. He made me a “cocktail” but it was just a half shot of Tito’s vodka with cherry 7up (my favorite). It was good. I felt a little goofy, but it didn’t last too long.

At the outlets we stopped in a baby store and looked at things for the future. There is so much to buy. We bought a tiny onesie and a little stuffed lamb. I expected him to tell the saleslady we were buying for a friend or something, but he put his arm around me and said we were getting ready for our own. That's a big step for him. He's opening up.

Most of the people are gone and just a few of his friends are left and they’re deep in a video game so I have a little time to work on Lukas. This chapter isn’t going to be super dramatic, but the next one will be, I needed to do some setup.

Tomorrow is his actual birthday and I'll wake him up with a nice breakfast and his last gift.

Oh his gifts! I got him Dodger's tickets, a new wireless phone charger, and some new boxer briefs I plan to see him in. Tomorrow I'll give him the new digital photo frame with updated pics of us for his desk at work.

Some things were meant to be...

A. (the Persian husband) is trapped on the westside for a five pm meeting and he sent me this video with a message saying "How I feel about coming home to you after a very long day." 

Isn't that so cute? I love 21 Pilots. A. is so unbelievably sweet sometimes. I know his day was crazy and he still took time to think of me. 

I'm making pizza for dinner when he comes home. He likes my homemade pizza and I have a variety of stuff for him to choose to put on it. He gets 3/4 and I get 1/4. His is the more interesting part. I just like cheese and tomatoes and some spices. His is piles of fun. No pepperoni or things that come from pigs though. We are a Halal house. 

It was a good week. I even took a good nap today after the gym. I have my classes set and next week they are supposed to post the syllabi so I can go through and start on some projects and reading. 

He says he has a few rent-a-friends (tutors) to interview for me. He's meeting with them Monday at his office. He will interview and select one. I'm not good at picking people. I like everyone and I can't stand to reject someone. That's his department. 

I'm ready for a nice long weekend together. He is going to take us shopping and then his birthday is coming up! We're having his party on Sunday so his friends can come out. Most of his college friends are still where we used to live so they will come here and we are going to barbecue and have a fun day. He invited some of my friends too. We'll go to the grocery store tomorrow after shopping so we can load up on supplies. There will be lots of alcohol, not much for me. He said he'll make me a cocktail I'll like.