Quiztime

We had an early dinner and we're spending the evening in bed. It's funny watching him work on his laptop in bed. He sits with his knees up and his laptop balanced on his legs but it slides down and rests against his... package. I pointed that out to him "You use your junk to hold your laptop." 

He laughed and said, "It is strong enough to hold you so a laptop is easy." Fair point. 

I like to go through relationship quizzes with him. He thinks its a waste of time, but I found this one interesting: 7 Habits that lead to Divorce. 

He says these are just ways for them to sell ads and not actual scientific articles or quizzes. He still suffers through them when I bug him with them. 

1. Being Overly Affectionate During The Newlywed Phase Of Your Marriage
-Ok so we have always been overly affectionate since even before I really knew he was into guys. It's been almost 4 years and we're still like that. 

2. Avoiding Confrontation
-This one is entirely my fault. I hate confrontation and he knows this so most of our important conversations are at night in bed with the lights off when he's less intimidating. He draws it out of me and never makes me feel bad for the way I feel or the things I ask for. 

3. Letting Debt Pile Up
- He handles all the money. I don't even pull out my wallet when we buy things. He would think that is ridiculous. I know he has savings for all kinds of things plus we don't really pay for thing. His car and our apartment are through his company and he owns the townhouse we lived in and rents that out so I assume we are good. 

4. Arguing over Chores
-We never do that. When we first lived together I would complain about him leaving his clothes wherever he took them off when coming home from work, but chores are my duty since he works. He does take out the trash and he does carry all the groceries and heavy things. 

5. Addiction to games and smartphones 
-This one is more bothersome to him. When we go to dinner or spend time on the couch, we never take out our phones and he will ignore his emails and things until we have had our time together or finished our conversation. He does work a lot so I don't complain. When he does play video games (which is rare these days) I will watch or go do my writing. He deserves time to blow off steam. 

6. Venting about the relationship to others. 
-Do I do that on here? I hope not. When I get mad at him and tell my dad, he always says the same thing, "HE is your husband, Em. You chose him so go and work it out with him." 

7. Being jealous of your partner's success. 
-I love his success. He is the alpha daddy who takes care of business and provides for his family. I would never want to do what he does. He loves his job and making big deals. I would hate that life and I would hate the pressure of keeping everything going like he does. He is a hard worker and I love the look he gets when I tell him how proud I am of him. He beams. 

Egyptian boys are pretty.

I am working on a new series! I really like how it's shaping up. I am doing the perspective of the alpha muslim boy hunting down a reluctant boy he thinks needs saving. This time I'm back with an Egyptian boy. He's in LA right now (of course) but maybe the story will get back to Egypt. Not sure where it will go. 

I really want to go to Egypt some day. Out of all the middle eastern countries, I want to visit Iran (of course since I married an Iranian), but next up would be Egypt. 

Alexandria

I knew an Egyptian boy in high school I kind of had a crush on. He was one of those nerdy guys that looked hot with his shirt off. He was so straight and my dad would never let me spend the night at his house when he invited me, but I had lots of dreams about him. He went off to Stanford when we graduated (of course). 

One night when my husband was scrolling through his facebook, I made him look up the Egyptian guy. A took one look at him and my face and quickly said "He is ugly. I do not like this boy." haha. He can be a little jealous some times. 

al-Qahirah/Cairo

My husband has been to Egypt. He says it is crowded, hot, and struggling under the weight of its growth. He's been everywhere. I am jealous sometimes about how much he has seen, but as he likes to say, "I settled here. California is best." 

He really has no interest in taking me anywhere near the Middle East. He thinks boys like me are quickly taken as it is assumed American boys are easy, especially "light" boys like me. I think that's his way of saying I am obviously gay and quiet. Someday though he says he will take me to see the pyramids. 

C'est Fin, Lukas

Chapter 20, the final chapter of Lukas is posted. I think it is the first time I ever wrote a final chapter for any of my series. All of the other ones just kind of stop. It was really difficult to do and I still have so much more I could put into that story to end it. But I did enough to give it a good sendoff. 

I didn't know where I would want to go next with Lukas and Ari.

Yesterday the husband surprised me by saying to pack an overnight bag for a resort. We haven't been to one in a long time. He has this group of friends he hasn't hung out with in awhile. They like to go to Vegas and the desert California casinos. So when they showed up I could guess where we were headed. It was so pretty! It's a resort that just opened and the room was so techy! There were charger plugs everywhere! Like seriously! He could even charge his phone next to the toilet! Why is that a thing? 😁

We always do the same thing when we go. We settle in and explore the place. This one has a crazy new pool but it was too cold to swim so we just hung out and got some hot cocoa and laid in the loungers. Then we had playtime then dinner then he went to play some cards and I went to the coffee place and wrote a little. 

Usually about 9ish he comes back and I get changed into pajamas. Then he finds something good for me to watch and he goes back to playing. If he sneaks in late and doesn't wake me up then I know he lost. If he wins, he comes in and showers me with a wad of cash. Last night I got showered. 🤑

We hadn't done that in forever. He likes the resort things because everything is under one roof. Room, fun, dinner, pool, gym, coffee, clubs, whatever we want. 

It was nice to get out of LA for a night. We have so much fun in a hotel. He deserved a night of fun with his boys. Maybe soon we will be traveling like that with me and the baby in the room. We'll get room service and chill with the baby then he can sneak off and let off some steam. 

He deserves it for all he does for me. He's a good man and when I get him alone away from the world in a nice room with a mountain view and a couple drinks in him he really turns it up for me.... Sorry. TMI!! But happy me :) 

Thursday Thoughts...

I'm pretty much finished with the last Lukas chapter. I tried to include all the things people asked for. I just need to go over it once more before I send it in. This one was so hard to write. I still need one good ending paragraph. After this I am going to take a break for awhile. 

I didn't want to mess it up, but also I am very distracted these days with all the baby stuff going on. Every time I look at the chapter I open up another window and look at some parent blog or watch some youtube video or something about babies. 

At first I was just going along with the baby thing to make my husband happy, but now I am really getting into it. There is so much information out there about baby first aid, feeding, changing, cleaning, babyproofing, etc... It is like an avalanche every time I hit search. Then I look up and my husband is there waiting for dinner. 

He loves that I am getting into this so much. I even dragged him through the baby clothes at Target when we were just there to grab laundry soap. 

It snowed today around LA! None here, but it is SO cold!! We are setting records this week. 

In the next few weeks we should find out if the fertilization is a go. It takes time. 

His sperm is all good though. They said it should work nicely. He was so proud like he expected a trophy. I joked that he should get a medal. I ordered him a gold one from amazon. They didn't have any that mentioned sperm... 

Abstinence :(

We are trying to make a baby and tomorrow the husband is going in to give his contribution and get it checked out. 

It's creating a problem I hadn't thought about. He wants to make sure he has a full cannon so we have had no together time since Valentine's night 😡He's also been eating strictly protein and wearing his old loose flannel boxers (I thought I'd thrown them all away). 

I didn't realize how dependent I am on our daily interactions. I keep reaching for it then stopping myself. I'm so used to just going for it. He never stops me. It's my security... pole. 

I think the longest we have gone is 36 hours except for the time he was traveling to Europe without me. It is making us both very cranky. Yesterday we had to go to Disneyland to distract ourselves. We walked all around the park and wore ourselves out so we went to bed early. 

Then today we went back to Orange County for the LGBT parent group we have been hanging out with. We made a day of it. The guys sympathized with the process! They mostly adopted, but two of the couples started on the route we're going with the surrogate process, but thought it was too expensive. 

We went to a pizza place that had games for the kids. It was cool. I rarely got to go to those places growing up so we played a lot. 🙋

It was funny they thought it was weird we just like to hang out with each other at Disneyland. We do ride some rides, but we have our out of the way spots to just sit and talk. My husband is a talker and a very interesting guy. He knows a ton about a lot of different things. We are comfortable with each other being silent, but we also spend a lot of time just talking to each other about things. He is a good listener too, even when I feel like my stuff is dumb kid stuff compared to his very grown-up-ness. 

I will be glad tomorrow after he finishes at the clinic and I can have my time back with it. He tried to get me to go about my normal routine, but I didn't want him to have to suffer while I enjoy myself. That wouldn't be right. It is making for some crazy dreams! 

V-Day in LA

Yesterday was Valentine's day here in the US. I don't know if it is a world-wide thing. 

I woke up snuggled into my husband's side with an arm across his chest. I thought he was still asleep. I move my hand and my wrist feels weird. I look and see a red ribbon tied around it and then I follow the ribbon up to see one of those red foil helium balloons in the shape of a heart. He had tied it to my wrist without waking me up. He takes great pride in doing things to me without waking me up. He thinks it's funny... 

I wave my arm around and he starts laughing then tells me happy Valentine's day. The bad thing was that I needed to pee and I couldn't undo his knot so I had to trail it with me to the bathroom. He had done some crazy Iranian Army knot so I eventually had to cut it. He filmed me struggling with it. He thinks he is hilarious. 

We had a great V-day though. I got him the cologne that I love to smell on him. He got me flowers and chocolate and took me out for breakfast. He had to work, but we had a fun night when he got home. There were crazy storms yesterday! Lots of flooding. 

This cologne always brings me to his lap, but it also makes others flirt with him so...

We have been super busy, especially with the baby-making process going on. It could take a month or so to actually get it growing and then 9 months after it actually works. It could take a year and a lot of money before we actually have a baby. He is determined to have us in a house by July. 

He is doing really well and making a lot of money for the company that brought him on, and they are heavily helping with the baby costs, but they don't want him moving to Orange County. He says he will make it work but he wants us in a safe, quiet, gated, heavily patrolled city before the baby comes. 

Life is busy, but I am finding a little time to write. I need to finish this chapter. I need two more pages! I can do it! 

Baby-Daddy

I am just about finished with the final chapter of Lukas & The Shah. I should submit it this week. I just want to read it over a few times. I almost never write final chapters.  I'm not good at goodbyes, but I have other series floating around in my head. Not sure what I will write next. I feel like I am on the edge of big changes and that kind of is pulling me away from writing... 

Things are getting real in babyland! Since his parents moved to the US, my husband has been all focused on starting our family. He wants us moving into a house this summer. 

My cousin is going this week to donate her eggs and then my husband is going to go and add his part. I haven't met the surrogate. It's an agency thing and he has met with her, but I didn't want to... not yet. Once it takes, he says we will have weekly things with her. It's supposed to be activities for the pre-birth bonding. Like to talk to it in the womb and other weird stuff. I don't know... 

My husband is going to make recordings that she will play using these special headphones that go over where the baby is growing. Wombphones or wombpods or something. I don't know. He got a few books to read for the recording and then later when the baby is born we will read the books to him/her. 

It will be interesting to see if the baby shows any kind of familiarity with the story. I told my husband we need to get two books that he does not read to the baby. Then when the baby is born we can see if he/she has a preference for the stories my husband read. 

He is also going to make some Persian recordings for the baby so he/she can start learning Farsi or at least have some familiarity with it. 

The surrogate thing is super expensive, but part of the deal in working for the company that recruited him was that they cover some of it and help make it somewhat affordable. He says it is still super expensive, but he has saved for it. I'm kind of getting excited for it. 

Snoopy Bear

Um kind of weird, but my mother-in-law was in our bedroom this morning. My husband had left for work and I went to the gym with his brother to work out. His mom was cleaning up breakfast stuff and she had said through the translator app my husband put on her phone (Google is amazing!) that she was going to wash clothes. 

When we got back from the gym I didn't see her so I went into my bedroom (that I share with my husband obviously) and I found her sitting on the bed holding this stuffed build-a-bear my husband made for me like years ago when we were dating. 

He got it for me after the first time we did serious stuff together... like naked stuff. He got it because I had said at the mall that I'd always wanted one when I was a kid, but now I was too old for stuffed animals. He put the voice recorder thing in it and recorded three messages for me that play when you touch different parts of the bear. 

It's not dirty stuff, but it's lovey stuff. We were newish and texting or calling each other every five minutes. We'd talk on the phone every night until I fell asleep. He would stay there and listen to me breath and make sure I was out before he hung up. He made the bear in case I woke up and needed to hear his voice again or if I just wanted to hear him any other time. 

He used to always take little videos of me. He kept them on his phone and computer. He thought the way I eat ice cream is weird/cute so he recorded it. Or anything I did that he thought was cute, he'd pull out his phone and get a video of me. Most of his videos are me going "Stop. Why are you recording this? You're weird. Stop!" 

She had the bear and was using the google translator on her phone to figure out what her son had recorded for me!! Seriously private messages and she was translating them!! 

I thought she would be shocked or ashamed that I caught her, but she didn't seem the least bit disturbed at me walking in and seeing her invade our privacy. She smiled at me and held up the bear and said "Good! Is nice!" Then she put it back on the shelf (I can't sleep with him because he's too noisy whenever I shift or move). Then she goes and gets our clothes from the laundry hamper and smiles again and leaves. 

Seriously! I guess it's good she wasn't freaked about the bear... or her son making it for me... or even the fact that we are very much in love. But it still felt kind of weird that she was just looking around our room like it's an open museum. 

They are flying back to Texas tomorrow. My husband is coming home from work at lunch time to take them. I will miss her cooking and cleaning, but it will be nice to be back to our normal happy twosome. I know my dad lives with us, but he is very non-intrusive and he works a lot and hangs out with his friends a lot. 

Just had to vent that!! I feel weird about it. I told the husband when he got home, and he rolled his eyes and sighed and said that in her head she was showing acceptance of us. He said that if she didn't approve of us she would avoid our room completely since it is the place where we... do what two people in love do. He said she wouldn't take an interest in the things on our shelves or pictures or couple items if she didn't accept us. 

But he still felt bad that it creeped me out. I guess he is right. I should just let it go and see it from a good perspective. She will be here MUCH more often when we have babies! I already know that... and I can't wait for her help. :) My husband says she will definitely help us adjust. I KNOW I will need that, so I need to keep things happy between us. 

😜

Super Sunday

The family-in-law is here. They came in Thursday not Wednesday (I'm bad with days). I think they are stressing my husband out. This morning we woke up but stayed in bed until his mom knocked on our door to check on us. 

It was pouring down rain all crazy yesterday and he's getting sinus problems from running around in it the last few days. His mom is babying him beyond belief! I usually take care of him when he's sick, but she is kind of overdoing it. She made some crazy soup remedy and then decided to clean our place like that is what was making him sick. I clean this place like crazy!! I have bleach wipes in every room of the house! But whatever. I let her sweep imaginary dust. My husband feels sick so I'm keeping things happy for him. 

It has been nice having her cook! :) She makes these big elaborate dinners that completely trash the kitchen and then when I try to help her clean up she shoos me away. So that is nice! :) 

Friday I took his mom and brother out on the town. It went well! The really liked The Grove and Farmer's Market. It's really old, right by where CBS was. I don't think they film anything there anymore, but we used to see the Price is Right audience lined up some mornings when I would commute with my husband. 

His brother bought a lot of clothes and his mom got me some too. It's been nice. I think my dad has a crush on his mom. He saw me communicating with brother-in-law using google translate and later I saw my dad trying it with his mom. He has always kind of eyed her, but now he is armed with communication. haha. I think he has zero chance. She is happily married and my father-in-law is a very handsome and attentive husband. Maybe he's just being friendly! 

They are all watching the super bowl now. I need to get to writing. I have things to publish!!