keedz

I saw this hot guy at the grocery store today with a little 2 yr old in his cart. He looked like he just came from the gym and they were talking about what to make for dinner. He sounded straight, I don’t know. It just got me daydreaming how nice that would be to be out and pushing a cart with a kid and shopping, talking about what to make for dinner when Baba (Persian word for dad) gets home from work. They were so cute.

I know our plan is to wait until I finish school and I'm already stressed enough being a full time student and taking care of our home. I also know that AT (the fiancee) is very very ready to start a family with me. He gets very happy when I bring up having kids. I never understood it before we got together, but now I can see his excitement.

I can see us going around the park or at the grocery store with a baby strapped to my chest. I can see us finding couple friends who have similar aged kids.

I know me finishing school first is non negotiable. AT promised my dad that I would finish and he would pay for it. He is very much a guy who keeps his word, and it's always good to have a college degree in case something happens to him or us and I have to support the family.

But... But... But I want one.

I'm also going to have to learn how to drive and we'll need a car, and a bigger house.

Yesterday I went with AT for work. He had some meetings and some reports to prepare. We ended up way down in Orange County and he showed me a few houses and neighborhoods he likes. They were in very safe, quiet areas. He definitely wants to get us down there before we have kids.

The Playlist

Writing is going a little slower these days. We've had some pretty big events this summer and I want to get them right. 

I am all about Mura Masa these days. I changed out some of the songs in our sex playlist. I am so in love with this song and the video is bomb: 

The gay couple in the video kind of reminds me of me and the fiancee, just the size difference between us. He is taller but not crazy tall and bulkier, muscular. But when he stands over me like that and I just feel surrounded by him. And that poor Japanese girl. I want to hug her. 

Lovesick is another good one. I expect big things from this guy. 

The rules for our sex playlist is that we can only remove songs we added and it has to be at least somewhat half and half of us. It's kind of funny when I add a new song and he like stops and nods his head and listens to see if he likes it. 

Most of my music is like get down to it beats. His style is more sweet tender love and a lot of Persian stuff. Sometimes it's a slow Persian song that is soulful and he'll stop and look down at me and sing in his deep, flat tone. He's not the best, but for me it's just so perfect. 

The thing about sex playlist is that there is only one situation in which we can play it. So it's no good in the car or for cleaning or other things. You have to save those songs. Ok back to writing Noah.  

Rulers of the HOA

This cracks me up. So AT (the fiancee) is the king of our little development. Everyone comes to him with their issues and he gives advice or helps them solve it. He reviews all the bills and checks for our HOA and gets things fixed. 

There's mostly older people where we live and a few young singles who are never around. AT, being the natural charmer and buff guy that he is, is the only one who knows everyone and helps them work together. There's an older lady who lives right across from us and she's retired. He brings her a pack of cigarettes sometimes and she adores him so she watches our house all day. Nothing much happens, but she will text him and when we get packages she'll grab them until he gets home. 

The funny thing is that sometimes I run across people like when I'm going to gym or the mailbox and they'll want me to pass along something to him. They approach me with this respect that I'm not used to. It's like they really want AT to think highly of them. He doesn't do anything other than talk to people or smooth things over so it's not like he's some angry overlord. I just think it's funny. Like I'm some kind of powerful person. 

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I'm working on Ch. 22 of Noah. I'm 1/4 of the way through. I think after this chapter I'm going to take a break from writing. We have a wedding to plan for and then classes are going to start for me. Plus he is really trying to push me to be ok with moving to the OC. 

AT is saying it would be nice to start 2018 with a new and bigger place. Even worse is that now my dad is thinking he might move with us which negates my excuse for not wanting to go because my dad would be far away. They talked about it and AT says my dad could stay with us and save money until he could get his own place if he wants to. I would actually love to have my dad there. 

So I'm kind of out of excuses... I have to face the truth that I just really hate change. 

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Yesterday our internet went down. I texted him and he came home after work and tried to fix it. He looked so hot crawling around on the floor trying to rework things. He got home and had his suit on, but as he tried to fool with the internet stuff he kept removing his clothes once piece at a time. Finally he was just crawling on the floor in a pair of blue boxer briefs that had my full attention. He looks so hot when he's in fix-it mode. I am definitely going to get him a tool belt to wear around the house.  He always acts surprised when I get turned on by him. Like he doesn't realize how hot he is. He's a good man.